Your wit makes others witty.
I have no way to defend my borders but to extend them.
The title of Queen rang sweet to my ears, child though I was. … This idea of a crown began running in my head then like a tune, and has been running a lot in it ever since.
God, grant us our desires, and grant them quickly.
All this is only for the mice and myself to admire!
The laws ought to be so framed as to secure the safety of every citizen as much as possible. … Political liberty does not consist in the notion that a man may do whatever he pleases; liberty is the right to do whatsoever the laws allow. … The equality of the citizens consists in that they should all be subject to the same laws.
One does not always do the best there is. One does the best one can. – Catherine the Great
If it weren’t for my lawyer, I’d still be in prison. It went a lot faster with two people digging.
The anticipation for Tina playing Palin was so fun to witness, and she explains it well in her book Fifty Shades of Grey. She totally took on what was expected of her and it was awesome to stand next to her as she killed.
Communism must be like one big phone company.
The secret source of humour itself is not joy, but sorrow. There is no humour in heaven.
I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.
I saw a bank that said ’24 Hour Banking’, but I don’t have that much time!
No one goes there nowadays, it’s too crowded.
There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor.
No one looks stupid when they’re having fun!
If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.
I really do believe that anything in life – any obstacle or challenge – can be made better with humor.
I took a speed reading course and read ‘War and Peace’ in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
[on Tina Fey] I like to say our relationship is as old as Lourdes Ciccone
If the phone doesn’t ring, it’s me.
Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
