People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.
Money’s only something you need in case you don’t die tomorrow.
The only point in making money is, you can tell some big shot where to go.
When people ask me if I have any spare change, I tell them I have it at home in my spare wallet.
The only way you will ever permanently take control of your financial life is to dig deep and fix the root problem.
I’m so poor I can’t even pay attention.
Money gives me the creeps and mildly embarrasses me. I get paid too much anyway.
Whoever thinks that money can’t buy happiness . . . just doesn’t know where to shop!
I’m so naive about finances. Once when my mother mentioned an amount and I realized I didn’t understand, she had to explain: That’s like three Mercedes.’ Then I understood.
Fortune does not change men, it unmasks them.
Money is a handmaiden, if thou knowest how to use it; a mistress, if thou knowest not.
Philanthropic efforts are among the best rewards you can have for a life well lived.
Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won’t be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did.
The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.
Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.
It is easier to ask for money when you don’t need the money.
The point is, you can never be too greedy.
Money and women. They’re two of the strongest things in the world. The things you do for a woman you wouldn’t do for anything else. Same with money.
It’s money. I remember it from when I was single!
Budget: a mathematical confirmation of your suspicions.
You can’t tell a millionaire’s son from a billionaire’s.
