Zsa Zsa Gabor

When in trouble, take a bath and wash your hair.

Getting divorced just because you don’t love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.

I don’t take gifts from perfect strangers-but then, nobody is perfect.

To be loved is a strength. To love is a weakness.

I pay all my own bills… I want to choose the man. I do not permit men to choose me.

Husbands are like fires – they go out when unattended.

Remember-the only place men want depth in their women is in her décolletage.

I’m a bit hesitant to do anything because I’m actually kind of lazy and I’d like an easier life from now on. The world’s a massive place with lots of early mornings and late starts when you’re working.

When I was a question on Jeopardy!, that’s when I felt famous!

That is not a functional use of language. That is a drunk driver crashing a pickup truck full of alphabet soup.

I believe I was definitely sent down here to take people away for a little while, to make them happy.

I’ve never done work for money, ever. If your choices are based on grosses and the film doesn’t do well, what does that mean? It leaves you with nothing.

It’s been quite a journey. I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world!

I’m really an outdoorsy girl. People think I can’t go anywhere without getting all primped up, but I love to go camping, and I’m totally fine with not doing my hair or makeup, not taking a shower and just hiking.

Now, if it’s just a little toe-tapper, got to make me feel good somehow or another, or when I sing it I can’t make you feel good.

[reacting to George Zimmerman’s acquittal] I think it might honestly be time for the Sunshine State to officially change its motto to the Worst State.

I don’t want to be somebody else.

In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I’m sorry, did I say ‘scientists’? I meant ‘Irish people.’

Prison sentences are a lot like penises – if they’re used correctly, even a short one can do the trick… is a rumor I have heard.

His (Freddie Mercury) words got better quickly. There were some very overt lyrics. Don’t Stop Me Now is a good example. He was having a good time, and that was very much a cri de coeur. Some lyrics we wrote together like I’m Going Slightly Mad, which was funny. We had fun coming up with daft things, all those ridiculous phrases. I’d say it was Freddie’s actual musicality which was the cleverest thing of all, the notes, and his harmonic structure was quite brilliant. When he wrote The Fairy Feller’s Master-Stroke, on the second album, he was crossing sections of six-part harmonies, and I thought: “Bloody hell, that is tricky stuff.” Then there’s The March Of The Black Queen, which is almost like prog-rock, and so outrageously complicated that I can’t even remember the arrangement myself. When you write songs that complex, you have to work hard at it, and it did invoke a lot of head-scratching. But then he’d come up with Killer Queen or, later on, lots of simple things like Crazy Little Thing. He had it on all sides. Freddie evolved. I always called him ‘the man who invented himself’. I think the talent was innate, but he dug deep inside himself and forced it out. His determination was quite something.

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you you are making too much money.