Zach Braff

I was kosher until I had my Bar Mitzvah, and I parlayed officially becoming a man into telling my father I wanted to eat cheeseburgers.

[On Hollywood’s initial response to his Garden State script] Everyone said no. Everyone with a date book and a phone in Los Angeles said no.

I’m kind of jealous of the life I’m supposedly leading.

I love Scrubs. It’s the best day job in the world.

Maybe that’s all that family really is, a group of people who all miss the same imaginary place.

[On working with Woody Allen] That was a very surreal experience: I had studied the script right down to the punctuation marks, and then he would say ‘we’re not going to say what’s on the page, and you don’t really have to either, try to keep up.’

Wafah Dufour bin Laden, niece of Osama bin Laden has signed a contract to star in a reality show…called Skating with the Nieces of Terrorists.

It’s good to get information and feedback from your fans on the Internet. But a lot of it is downright mean. There are three or four guys who say they’re Vince Neil and people come to the shows because these guys promise them tickets, and when there’s no tickets there, they get mad at the band. That kind of stuff bums me out.

[On her most dreadful crush] I used to drive, pretty pathetically, I’d just drive by their house all the time and they didn’t know who I was. I’d just drive by the house all the time. I once knocked on the window and I thought, “What am I doing? What am I going to say if they come to the door and don’t know who I am?”

I started doing comedy because that was the only stage that I could find. It was the pure idea of being on stage. That was the only thing that interested me, along with learning the craft and working, and just being in productions with people.

[on marriage] I’m a fan of marriage, but more for other people right now than for myself.

I definitely felt like I needed a break, because when you do so much, you’re not able to appreciate the things that you accomplish.

Spring is nature’s way of saying, “Let’s party!”

My first kiss was when I was 12.

I knew I had to make a sacrifice to do what I’ve always wanted to do.

Nudity for fictional characters is as normal and mundane as eating breakfast. What bothers me is our culture’s obsession with nudity. It shouldn’t be a big deal, but it is. I think this overemphasis with nudity makes actors nervous. There’s the worry about seeing one’s body dissected, misrepresented, played and replayed on YouTube.

There were the Pussycat Dolls, and there’s a band called Perfect Pussy, but they’re white, so they get the pass. I can’t be Junglepussy and black, but I just push through, especially when my mother says she doesn’t have a problem with it.

Meryl Streep, one of the most over-rated actresses in Hollywood, doesn’t know me but attacked last night at the Golden Globes. She is a Hillary flunky who lost big. For the 100th time, I never mockeda disabled reporter (would never do that) but simply showed him grovellingwhen he totally changed a 16 year old story that he had written in order to make me look bad. Just more very dishonest media!

The good Lord doesn’t tell you what His plan is, so all you can do is get up in the morning and see what happens next.

Kyle saw the things he didn’t accomplish but he could help Adam accomplish.

Cocaine is God’s way of saying that you’re making too much money.