Robin Williams

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.

Ballet: Men wearing pants so tight that you can tell what religion they are.

[on his acting career] All the new people you meet, it’s pretty amazing. The vampire needs new blood. And there is still a lot to learn and there is always great stuff out there. Even mistakes can be wonderful.

They’re talking about partial nuclear disarmament, which is also like talking about partial circumcision- you either go all the way or forget it.

[on Popeye] If you watch it backwards, it has a plot.

I believe I could do dance on ice, or play in a musical of Freud’s life called ‘It’s Your Mother’ – or maybe one for the symbolists: ‘Jung at Heart’. There’s always the one about India: ‘The Gandhi Man Can’.

Touring is tough. You’re almost in a haze because you don’t really know where you are half the time: You’re in a hotel room one moment, and the next thing you know, you’re onstage performing for 60,000 people, then you’re back on an airplane. It’s very hectic and I couldn’t do it without my family.

Being jealous of a beautiful woman is not going to make you more beautiful.

The thing is, we’re not extravagant people. It’s just unbelievable the amounts of money we make. But we don’t spend it. It’s too scary to spend it.

I didn’t think my career would last this long, and it’s still going.

[On his favourite scene from “New Moon”] The Volterra scene, where I have to step into the light. There were many extras and many fans there. Some fans travelled across the world to be there. I felt a huge sense of responsibility, being in front of so many that are so obsessed with this story. It was nerve wrecking, but I never felt closer to the character before this.

Fame always brings loneliness. Success is as ice cold and lonely as the North Pole.

I’ve always been very positive and very resilient.

This is what I tell young women who ask me for career advice. People are going to try to trick you. To make you feel that you are in competition with one another. “You’re up for a promotion. If they go for a woman, it’ll be between you and Barbara.” Don’t be fooled. You’re not in competition with other women. You’re in competition with everyone.

That said, my kids are at home right now with my husband and I’m missing something important at my daughter’s school which makes me feel sick inside. It’s a lot of balance and a lot of really hard decision making.

I believe ‘ye’ is the most commonly used word in the Bible, and in the Bible it means ‘you’.

Easter is very important to me, it’s a second chance.

I’ve had some pretty good experiences on everything, even if the film doesn’t always work.

There’s so many parts of your life, you know? People say that you don’t get any better after the age of about forty or something like that, as a performer. I find all that to be a misconception. I don’t feel bad about the way I present stuff. The calendar and the mirror – they’re bastards.

People say, Kanye he’s so crazy, he’s this, he’s that. People call you crazy so much you start to believe it yourself.

I definitely felt like I needed a break, because when you do so much, you’re not able to appreciate the things that you accomplish.