Tina Fey

I’m married, you know. I love my husband and I have a child.

[Feminism] means that you believe in the equality of the sexes in every way.

I am a big Jeff Richmond fan.

I never dreamed I would receive the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, mostly because my style is so typically Austrian.

You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.

Gay people don’t actually try to convert people. That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.

It’s OK to quote from your past. But I’m more interested in quoting from my present and pointing towards the future.

I was a very confident little kid.

This Velvet Mafia thing is just another homophobic, nasty kind of thing that jealous queens make up.

For anyone who feels the need to hate, just know I’m looking at my phone like #GirlBye!

They always ask me the same questions. Where was I born? When did I start singing? Who have I worked with? I don’t understand why they can’t just talk to me without all that question bit.

[On his first red carpet experience] I walked out the wrong car door and started walking into the crowd, An interviewer said, ‘Give your best horror scream,’ and Stan did this great scream and I was too much of a wimp to do one. It was pathetic!

There are some people in here who are not journalists. There’s a masseuse in here who’s not a journalist – I think that’s ever so exciting.

Obviously, [Hollywood is lacking] stories from women of color. If you talk about areas of the industry that are underrepresented, that is an area that the whole industry could stand with getting better at.

We are following other people’s opinions. We are controlled by the media. And today it all changes.

I don’t even have people’s phone numbers. I almost don’t want to have a girlfriend in this environment.

I’m not perfect! I’m human. I make mistakes. But I try to be as conscious as I can about things I should be. If I’m going to do something commercial and mainstream and made for the masses, I just believe you can make those kinds of films with quality – and good ideas and good intentions. There’s a lot of negativity out there.

But once I acclimated and really used fame for what it was offering me as a tool to serve my life purpose of inspiring and contributing, then it started to get fun again.

It sounds lame, but I was really concentrating on this job. It was my first American thing so I was pretty focused. I went to Portland for two months before we starting shooting, and I just didn’t talk to anybody for ages during the beginning of the shoot. I never went out, but I kind of broke down half way through. I was like, ‘Okay, people are starting to think that I’m actually out of my mind now.

A band’s only unique thing is its chemistry, especially if none of you are prodigious players or particularly handsome. The one thing you have is your uniqueness, so we hold on to that.

While Bette Midler is an extremely unattractive woman, I refuse to say that because I always insist on being politically correct.