Mark Twain

Classic – A book which people praise and don’t read.

When you ascend the hill of prosperity, may you not meet a friend.

The trouble with you Chicago people is that you think you are the best people down here, whereas you are merely the most numerous.

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which, before their union, were not perceived to have any relation.

It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.

Adam was but human-this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple’s sake, he wanted it only because it was forbidden. The mistake was in not forbidding the serpent; then he would have eaten the serpent.

Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its use.

The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it and ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is.

The truth is that there is nothing noble in being superior to somebody else. The only real nobility is in being superior to your former self.

It’s no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.

Lying rides upon debt’s back.

Why shouldn’t truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense.

For truth is precious and divine, too rich a pearl for carnal swine.

All truth is not to be told at all times.

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.

History is strewn thick with evidence that a truth is not hard to kill, but a lie, well told, is immortal.

Truth is so hard to tell, it sometimes needs fiction to make it plausible.

Truth isn’t truth.

It is a puzzling thing. The truth knocks on the door and you say, ‘Go away, I’m looking for the truth.’ and so it goes away. Puzzling.

Man has always sacrificed truth to his vanity, comfort and advantage. He lives by makebelieve.

Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing wrong with this, except that it ain’t so.