To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did; I ought to know because I’ve done it a thousand times.
A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be lead by the nose.
I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.
What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.
You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
A home without a cat-and a well-fed, well-petted and properly revered cat-may be a perfect home, perhaps, but how can it prove title?
If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill came always together, who would escape hanging?
Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.
Happiness ain’t a thing in itself -it’s only a contrast with something that ain’t pleasant. And so, as soon as the novelty is over and the force of the contrast dulled, it ain’t happiness any longer, and you have to get something fresh.
A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.
The trouble with you Chicago people is that you think you are the best people down here, whereas you are merely the most numerous.
The cat, having sat upon a hot stove lid, will not sit upon a hot stove lid again. But he won’t sit upon a cold stove lid, either.
All I say is, kings is kings, and you got to make allowances. Take them all around, they’re a mighty ornery lot. It’s the way they’re raised.
By common consent of all the nations and all the ages the most valuable thing in this world is the homage of men, whether deserved or undeserved.
Where a blood relation sobs, an intimate friend should choke up, a distant acquaintance should sigh, a stranger should merely fumble sympathetically with his handkerchief.
Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its use.
A powerful agent is the right word. Whenever we come upon one of those intensely right words… the resulting effect is physical as well as spiritual, and electrically prompt.
Really great people make you feel that you, too, can become great.
Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.
Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.
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