Mark Twain

The Pause; that impressive silence, that eloquent silence, that geometrically progressive silence which often achieves a desired effect where no combination of words, however so felicitous, could accomplish it.

Never do wrong when people are looking.

We are chameleons, and our partialities and prejudices change place with an easy and blessed facility, and we are soon wonted to the change and happy in it.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.

Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.

It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.

And you know, there’s less charm in life when you think about death–but it’s more peaceful.

If emotional pain or problems have cropped up in your life, you must insist on getting closure. Closure means you don’t carry the problem or the pain. You address the issue, then you slam shut the book and put it away.

I don’t like to read books. They muss up my mind.

Experience shows that the frequent use of severe punishment has never rendered a people better. The death of a criminal is a less effective means of restraining crimes than the permanent example of a man deprived of his liberty during the whole of his life to make amends for the injury he has done to the public.

A person should design the way he makes a living around how he wishes to make a life.

If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

When you get emotional, slow your thoughts down, and listen attentively (write it down). That way, you’ll be able to hear what you are thinking. You do this becoming very still and very quiet, and recording your thoughts. These high-speed thoughts and internal reactions always precede your feelings and emotions. Trust me, you did tell yourself something if you now feel anger, mad, anxious, frustrated, sad or depressed. From now on, whenever you get upset, listen ever so carefully, to what you are telling yourself.

Wealth is the product of a man’s ability to think.

The things you own end up owning you.

Look beyond the individual to the cause of his misery.

When everyone is against you, it means that you are absolutely wrong– or absolutely right.

People are used to being coddled.

The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopts them.

People who consistently win have a clear and thoughtful strategy. They know what they need to do and when they need to do it. They write it down so they stay on course, and avoid any alternative that does not get them closer to the finish line.

[Moving to the West] was a culture shock. I had never seen cereal before! We had cottage cheese and pancakes in Russia, not colorful circles that came in cardboard boxes.