When your children arrive, your heart becomes a room with wide open windows.
[a metaphor for the end of her marriage] The process of divorce is about loading a blanket, throwing it up, watching it all spin, and worrying what stuff will break when it lands.
Great people do things before theyre ready.
The streets and woods around my house were a perfect setting for fake mischief. I would spend all afternoon pretending I had run away and had to live on my own. I would bring Toll House cookies and a sweatshirt and try to make a fire. I would sneak out side my house at dusk with a pair binoculars and search the streets for murderers. I created scenarios in my head that I always managed to escape from kidnap fantasies where I would wriggle free from the ropes.
You know, it sounds like Im bragging in some way, but as far as career stuff, theres not that much stuff that scares me. I know what I can do well.
Always remember your kid’s name. Always remember where you put your kid. Don’t let your kid drive until their feet can reach the pedals. Use the right size diapers … for yourself. And, when in doubt, make funny faces.
[at the 2013 Golden Globe Awards] Meryl Streep is not here tonight. She has the flu and I hear she’s amazing in it.
I remember Tina Fey wrote a play about Catherine the Great f**king a horse and I thought, ‘That lady is hot stuff, I wanna know her.’
You know, as a comedian your body has to be I need to think of a better term than up for grabs but you kind of use whatever you have to get the laugh. And if youre worrying about how you look Vanity is the death of comedy.
Be yourself. No one else can be you.
If you can find a way to be truly ambivalent about what people think about you as an artist youre completely freed up because you just end up doing things that turn you on creatively, and then as a person you really try and drown the noise.
I just love bossy women. To me, bossy is not a pejorative term at all. It mans somebody’s passionate and engaged and ambitious and doesn’t mind leading.
[on her mother] shes a very smart, independent woman who was kind of coming into her own in the feminist movement of the 70s and 80s
It takes years to find your voice and seize your real estate.
[on Tina Fey] I like to say our relationship is as old as Lourdes Ciccone
I really do believe that anything in life – any obstacle or challenge – can be made better with humor.
You have to care about how good you are and how good you feel, but not about how good people think you are or how good people think you look.
No one looks stupid when they’re having fun!
I think I always feel like if everything went to shit, I would just teach improv at a theatre.
The anticipation for Tina playing Palin was so fun to witness, and she explains it well in her book Fifty Shades of Grey. She totally took on what was expected of her and it was awesome to stand next to her as she killed.
Women talk about stuff on the way to the valet that it takes men 10 years to admit to each other. The depth at which women talk to and about each other is invaluable to me. With your really, really close good friends you do that fast.
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