Tina Fey

Whitney Houston’s cover of “I Will Always Love You” was constantly on my FM Walkman radio around that time. I think that made me cry because I associated it with absolutely no one.

When choosing sexual partners, remember: talent is not sexually transmittable.

I really wasn’t heavy in high school. But no one feels right in their own skin, particularly in high school.

We need to stop talking about whether women are funny. And we need to acknowledge that black people are funnier than white people. Let’s discuss that.

Because every person, no matter who you are-how tall you are, how short you are-some things work on you and some things don’t. I don’t like to wear things that feel like costumes. Whenever I work with a stylist, I always find myself saying the same thing: ‘I want my dress to say, I’m just here from New York.’ That’s why I always end up in black or brown. If I try to wear too much color, I feel like I’m pretending to be from Los Angeles and I’m not getting away with it.

When I was going to school in, like, ’84 to ’88, you didn’t have cell phones. There was no e-mail, if you can wrap your brain around that.

That had her lip-syncing to a record… There was no protection for her as a person or as an artist…

When it comes down to the music, it’s just you and the microphone. It’s not you and the record execs.

They made a porn movie about Sarah Palin, and the same actress, Lisa Ann, played me in the porn version of 30 Rock. Weirdly, of the three of us, Lisa Ann knows the most about foreign policy.

Being noticed can be a burden. Jesus got himself crucified because he got himself noticed. So I disappear a lot.

I’m very outspoken. I will ask a silly question, but I really am deadly serious. I want to know the answer.

All I could think about was, ‘I just wanna blow him away. I wanna make him proud, because I really wanna sign with Timbaland and spend the rest of my career making music with Tim.’

I think too many people look at the arts with a religious outlook. Arts, music, singing and performing, it’s all make-believe.

I’ve got CDs in my car, listening all the time for that next song, because everybody’s looking.

I have two daughters, and we live here in Manhattan, and having gone through the Manhattan kindergarten application process, nothing will ever rival the stress of that.

I’ve only met Brad Pitt once before. Well, I didn’t really meet him. I kind of just stood behind him and smelled his hair. It smelled really good.

Part of being a sex symbol is very flattering and it does help you get success in the business – but only to a point. You’re stuck with that moniker forever, and it does cloud people’s imagination. They just can’t see you being able to do anything else.

Ladies gotta say no to their husbands at the movies. They gotta say: ‘No, we are watching back-to-back cancer movies. And then this movie about a cat.’

I’m starting to know how the world works a bit, and I’m learning more and more that the only thing that matters is what happens between ‘action’ and ‘cut’. I’m allowing myself to be a bit more selfish, for want of a better word, just that it’s OK to focus and that I don’t have to be nice to everybody.

One of my theories is that men love with their eyes; women love with their ears.

Talent is cheaper than table salt. What separates the talented individual with the successful one is a lot of hard work.