Samuel Butler

Self-preservation is the first law of nature.

The thief. Once committed beyond a certain point he should not worry himself too much about not being a thief any more. Thieving is God’s message to him. Let him try and be a good thief.

We all like to forgive, and love best not those who offend us least, nor who have done most for us, but those who make it most easy for us to forgive them.

The three most important things a man has are, briefly, his private parts, his money, and his religious opinions.

It is our less conscious thoughts and our less conscious actions which mainly mould our lives and the lives of those who spring from us.

All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income.

It was a very meaningful ceremony and marriage means a lot to me.

[on Michelle] A dedicated mom, a good friend, and someone who’s not afraid to poke a little fun at herself from time to time

The greatest day of my life was the day I married Mrs. Ford.

In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved.

By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.

There is nothing so much seduces reason from vigilance as the thought of passing life with an amiable woman in marriage.

My last divorce was in ’68. What made it come to a head was a promise. See, I had promised her that the next year I wouldn’t work as much. But then I got in trouble with the IRS, and I had to continue working just as much to pay the government. So she said I lied, which is something I never did.

Husbands and wives, first be faithful to each other. Second, keep the romance going all of your life by courting each other every day.

On Oct. 3, 1992, Barack and I were married in Chicago – and every day since, I’ve grown prouder and more in love with him.

Marriage is the best state for man in general, and every man is a worst man in proportion to the level he is unfit for marriage.

When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part.

Many people spend more time in planning the wedding than they do in planning the marriage.

There is no subject on which more dangerous nonsense is talked and thought than marriage.

I should like to know what is the proper function of women, if it is not to make reasons for husbands to stay at home, and still stronger reasons for bachelors to go out.

They that Marry for Money cannot have the true Satisfaction of Marriage; the requisite Means being wanting.