Barack Obama

I found this national debt, doubled, wrapped in a big bow waiting for me as I stepped into the Oval Office.

I’m a history buff, and I know that big changes take time. But I also know that, setting politics aside, usually things are never as good as you think they are or as bad as you think they are. And that has served me well temperamentally.

[on Michelle] A dedicated mom, a good friend, and someone who’s not afraid to poke a little fun at herself from time to time

There’s no doubt I’m a better man having spent time with Michelle. I would never say that Michelle’s a better woman, but I will say she’s a little more patient.

If you were going to list the 100 most popular things that I have done as president. Being married to Michelle Obama is number one.

You can’t deny women their basic rights and pretend it’s about your ‘religious freedom’. If you don’t like birth control, don’t use it. Religious freedom doesn’t mean that you can force others to live by your own beliefs.

My last divorce was in ’68. What made it come to a head was a promise. See, I had promised her that the next year I wouldn’t work as much. But then I got in trouble with the IRS, and I had to continue working just as much to pay the government. So she said I lied, which is something I never did.

Marriage is distinctly and repeatedly excluded from heaven. Is this because it is thought likely to mar the general felicity?

Husbands and wives, first be faithful to each other. Second, keep the romance going all of your life by courting each other every day.

There is nothing so much seduces reason from vigilance as the thought of passing life with an amiable woman in marriage.

[on Michelle] A dedicated mom, a good friend, and someone who’s not afraid to poke a little fun at herself from time to time

He didn’t dare to, because his father had a weak heart and habitually threatened to drop dead if anybody hurt his feelings. You may have noticed that people with weak hearts are the tyrants of English married life.

In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved.

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can’t sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can’t sleep with the window open.

Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of opportunity.

[on Michelle] Like a lot of political spouses, the role was thrust upon her. But I always knew she’d be incredible at it, and put her own unique stamp on the job. That’s because who you see is who she is-the brilliant, funny, generous woman who, for whatever reason, agreed to marry me. I think people gravitate to her because they see themselves in her-a dedicated mom, a good friend, and someone who’s not afraid to poke a little fun at herself from time to time.

[on Michelle] After about 15 years I finally figured out that she’s always right!

Both marriage and death ought to be welcome: The one promises happiness, doubtless the other assures it.

They that Marry for Money cannot have the true Satisfaction of Marriage; the requisite Means being wanting.

By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.

By taking a second wife he pays the highest compliment to the first, by showing that she made him so happy as a married man, that he wishes to be so a second time.