Albert Einstein

When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, you think it’s only a minute. But when you sit on a hot stove for a minute, you think it’s two hours. That’s relativity.

A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it.

Setting an example is not the main means of influencing others; it is the only means.

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

How I wish that somewhere there existed an island for those who are wise and of good will.

The person who reads too much and uses his brain too little will fall into lazy habits of thinking.

Accept the past for what it was. Acknowledge the present for what it is. Anticipate the future for what it can become.

From the day I arrived, California seemed like an enchanted land.

Times have not become more violent. They have just become more televised.

I don’t care about anyone not liking me, you b**thes barely like yourselves.

Children have helped me a lot.

A good man often appears gauche simply because he does not take advantage of the myriad mean little chances of making himself look stylish. Preferring truth to form, he is not constantly at work upon the facade of his appearance.

Parents need to dial in and know what their kids are doing.

When your life is nearly over, you will regret it if you look back and recall too many nights when you made excuses instead of making love.

As we advance in life we learn the limits of our abilities.

All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.

The only true test of values, either of men or of things, is that of their ability to make the world a better place in which to live.

I thought about writing a poem explaining how when you are lost at sea, even if you are rescued and survive, you never really come back. Then I realized everyone that’s ever been in love would already understand.

Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.

For them that think death’s honesty won’t fall upon them naturally life sometimes must get lonely.

You philosophers are lucky men. You write on paper and paper is patient. Unfortunate Empress that I am, I write on the susceptible skins of living beings.