Mark Twain

Often the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.

Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

We never become really and genuinely our entire and honest selves until we are dead – and not then until we have been dead years and years. People ought to start dead and then they would be honest so much earlier.

To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature Congressman.

In the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians to correct that.

Better a broken promise than none at all.

If to be interesting is to be uncommonplace, it is becoming a question, with me, if there are any commonplace people.

A day wasted on others is not wasted on one’s self.

Blood banks are all closed; you can’t use others to keep you warm.

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

Every one of us have things that we believe about ourselves when nobody else is looking, nobody else is listening, nobody else is monitoring what we’re doing. We believe things about ourselves.

It is better to deserve honours and not have them than to have them and not to deserve them.

Life is managed; it is not cured.

When you once get an idea in which you believe with all your heart, work it out.

No matter what side of the argument you are on, you always find people on your side that you wish were on the other.

The only thing you can give a man without hurting him is an opportunity.

Life is like improvised jazz. We cannot regulate all the variables. We must play it with panache and flair as best we can.

We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police.

I think everyone has their own set of problems, and sometimes I feel I’m in the middle of the biggest challenge of my life just trying to maintain normalcy in a kind of crazy lifestyle.

Before everything else, getting ready is the secret of success.

Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it.