Mark Twain

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss SLOWLY. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret anything. That makes you smile.

There was never yet an uninteresting life. Such a thing is an impossibility. Inside of the dullest exterior there is a drama, a comedy, and a tragedy.

Hardly a man in the world has an opinion upon morals, politics or religion which he got otherwise than through his associations and sympathies. Broadly speaking, there are none but corn-pone opinions. And broadly speaking, Corn-Pone stands for Self-Approval. Self-approval is acquired mainly from the approval of other people. The result is Conformity.

We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks, if we agree with him.

Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.

Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.

The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.

When a thought is too weak to be expressed simply, simply drop it.

Do you realize that you can’t play the game of life with sweaty palms?

We are here for experience, and experience is a preparation to know the Truth when we meet it.

Only once in my life was I on the edge of incivility.

Opinions are like asses, every body’s got one!

It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.

Beware of monotony; it’s the mother of all the deadly sins.

Some days, your perfume falls from your skin and settles in the staircase. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve stopped on the fourth step and felt all the ways I’ve fallen in love with you.

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.

You can do anything, but not everything.

There are ships sailing to my ports, but not a single one goes where life is not painful.

Punctuality is the virtue of the bored.

The only thing you can give a man without hurting him is an opportunity.

What is the one thing that I could do to help you?