Ambrose Bierce

Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.

Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.

Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.

Faith, n.: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.

Dream is not the thing what you see in sleep, dream is the thing that does not let you sleep.

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

You’ve got to teach youngsters the difference between right and wrong, but you shouldn’t try to poke it down their throats. Let them ask the questions and then give them the answers.

Am I ever gonna grow a thick skin? No.

Every situation needs a hero. Step up and be that for your child.

You say I started out with practically nothing, but that isn’t correct. We all start with all there is, it’s how we use it that makes things possible.

When you make changes in your life, make sure you’re moving toward the things you want.

Coaching your wife is like trying to baptize a cat.

If your neighbor has a completely different view on abortion, gay marriage, stem cell research, all of those things, you still are both Americans. Neither one of you is necessarily more patriotic than the other. Neither loves their country any more than the other one does.

Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it.

Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.

If you harbor hatred, anger, and bitterness (towards her), then you are absolutely locked into a bond through those negative emotions.

Respect for sovereignity, for privacy, for total independence. Gentle alliances against loneliness, they were, cool rational love-affairs without the love.

We each own one car, and we have a reasonable house. It’s a lovely place to be, but it’s not extravagant.

There’s no limit to the things you can do.