Tina Fey

Left to my own devices, I dress like I’m here to service your aquarium.

[on Amy Poehler] Not only is she not afraid to look silly, she’s not afraid to let you throw her in the air like a basketball and catch her.

I remember failing my Princeton interview. My mom wanted me to apply because ever since I was a kid she had this dream that I would apply to Princeton, but it was just not happening.

The only reward for anything is food.

I can’t believe you recently had a baby. How do you do it? [pause] The baby starts to come down…and once that happens you can’t-it comes out. Whether you let it or not, the baby comes out. So that’s how I did it.

Sometimes people expect that I’m going to be tough. It’s not a bad situation. People treat you better. People are on time.

No one leaves voicemails anymore they just text now so it’s a different time.

I’ve lived in this fame trip since 1986. I’ve found that unless you’re rooted in something bigger than fame, you start believing your own hype.

When Yale reached out, I thought it was a hoax, but they really followed through.

Maybe the best is yet to come, but I’ve already had the best.

I actually love the audition process, so I’m so happy to fight for things. I would love to read something that I want to fight for, but lately the scripts are not that compelling.

I’m not worried about legacy. I don’t even know what that actually means. I don’t think anyone knows. I hope at some point in my career when my name is mentioned, someone will say “Oh yeah he has a good song!” I’d be happy with that.

I hate that the paparazzi agencies get all of the fan accounts shut down! Ugh we have to think of something! Maybe start our own agency? And let all of the fans post whatever tf they want!!!!!

I’m often mistaken for Spanish or Latin descent.

As for my band, well, my mentors were Duke Ellington, Benny Goodman, Jimmie Lunceford, and no one had a band more smartly dressed than Duke.

It was reported that the New York Knicks have won all 12 of the home games attended by magician David Blaine. A spokesman for the Knicks said, ‘if this is what it takes to win, it’s not worth it.’

I usually don’t listen back to the shows but I finally did. Now I know the one thing that’s gonna make it even better than it already is!

The difference between male comedy writers and female comedy writers is that the male ones are taller and weigh more.

I love old music, old movies, screwball comedies, vintage clothes and basically I’m an old-fashioned gal.

You know, I have some issues. But I just love to play different characters all the time, and I try not to repeat myself too much.

The memories of a man in his old age, are the deeds of a man in his prime.