Jimmy Kimmel

I thought Laura’s record was going to be huge… It was not successful it sold something like 20 or 30,000 albums. Laura lacked a certain level of ambition and didn’t really want to do the things that people do to become known. So I thought I’d better get people to record these songs and make them hits so that people will see that she’s a great songwriter.

Well, I think you and I have always felt the same way – that we’re Jewish but we can get away with just being exotic. We’re kind of Jews in disguise.

The guys that don’t respect that history and tradition, I don’t think they’re going to be around all that long. And those guys who don’t know the history and tradition, I think it’s upon them to learn about it pretty quick if they want to be a success.

I’m always shocked by the people who I’m attracted to. It’s always completely random. I generally like people who are a bit crazy but yeah, that’s pretty much my only prerequisite.

If I hurt someone, if I were to accidentally poke someone’s eye out, I would laugh. And then I’d say, ‘I’m sorry, I really do feel bad,’ but then I’m on the floor rolling.

Well, for the My Generation album, there was nothing to be nervous about in them days. We used to take every day as it came. Every day was just a gig and I think we did the recording between gigs literally.

You don’t need people’s opinion on a fact. You might as well have a poll asking: ‘Which number is bigger, 15 or 5?’ or ‘Do owls exist?’ or ‘Are there hats?’

Carine Roitfeld is the Walt Disney of what Tumblr is today. She is the Kanye West of what Tumblr is today. She’s the single most important person to what street style is today. Carine Roitfeld is the Walt Disney of what Tumblr is today. She is the Kanye West of what Tumblr is today. She’s the single most important person to what street style is today.

If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important rule of beauty, which is: who cares?

You’d be surprised how much fun you start to have once ya stop giving A f**k.

A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that kills, no, no. They’d make a weapon that makes you feel bad for a while. About comic lines written by Mark Shaiman being removed for innuendo (i.e. Chip ‘n Dale are both strippers”) the week before for his presenting of Best Animated Film at the 77th Academy Awards: “For a while you get mad, then you get over it. They’re afraid of saying Olive Oyl is anorexic. It tells you about the state of humor. It’s strange to think: how afraid are you? We thought that they got the irony of it. I guess not.”

Some of the best times in my life happened under the influence of drugs… I’d still be doing it if I could make good judgement calls. I’d still be doing it if I didn’t blow up to the size of an aircraft hangar, because it was a great time.

Sometimes we have criticism that is very constructive.

I’m blessed with a lot of energy and stamina. I can’t stand sitting still. I went to a spa once with my mom and I was like, “Get me out of here!'”

D.C. went under federal control in 1801 and it wasn’t until the 1960s that D.C.’s then three quarters of a million citizens, mostly African American, were given even the most basic electoral rights … With that level of restriction the mayor of D.C. gets to run the city the way a school council president gets to run her high school.