David Geffen

[On school] Not only did I know that I wasn’t one of the smart kids in the class, but so did everyone else.

I’m going to go down and take care of the bill. I’m not going to embarrass you, just let me do it. I had such a great time, I just want it to be my treat. [On returning after several minutes red faced] They won’t take my check, I don’t know what we’re going to do. [Robertson said ‘David, what we’ve spent here, we’re going to have to do a lot of dishes.’] I’m going to call Prince Rupert [Loewenstein] and ask him to call the hotel and tell them I’m good for it. Or maybe he can pay the bill and then I’ll pay him back or something. [Prince Rupert vouched for his credit and the hotel agreed to accept Geffen’s check.]

Before you talk to people in music or entertainment or video games, or even gun control, you need to talk to psychiatrists.

[On Calvin Klein asking him ‘Why don’t you call it Geffen Records?’] People in the record business just don’t do that. They come up with names likes Asylum, Capricorn, or Island. [Calvin Klein said if you put your own name on the door ‘You’ll get laid more.’]

There were no role models, there were no other people I knew who were dealing with the same issues that I was dealing with. I had no idea if this was a stage I was going through or not. But I go to the draft board in Brooklyn and I fill out the form and there was a question that said ‘Do you have homosexual tendencies?’ and I check yes. But where-ever I was on line I’d see people I went to high school with and I was afraid of anyone knowing this about me so I kept on falling back into line and falling back into line. If you said you had homosexual tendencies they sent you to a psychiatrist. He said ‘I see here you’ve checked the box?’ And I said ‘yup’. He said ‘So do you think you’d have a problem serving in the armed forces?’ I said well you know ‘So many men.’ And I was out of the service.

The concept known as bal tashchit – ‘Do no destroy’ – has a special significance in Jewish tradition…We are constantly being warned in our faith that the capricious, thoughtless, wasteful destruction of the elements and creatures of the earth is wrong…We should remind ourselves daily of our responsibility to all aspects of creation.

Money is a handmaiden, if thou knowest how to use it; a mistress, if thou knowest not.

You can’t borrow your way to prosperity. Look for ways to create value and you will attract money.

The lack of money is the root of all evils.

I don’t mind that I’m fat. You still get the same money.

Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.

I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need; if I die by four O’clock.

The waste of money cures itself, for soon there is no more to waste.

It is easier to ask for money when you don’t need the money.

Money doesn’t talk, it swears.

It’s money. I remember it from when I was single!

I’m tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

I say, not in a braggadocios way, I’ve made billions and billions of dollars dealing with people all around the world.

Honesty is the best policy – when there is money in it.

I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed!

If all the rich people in the world divided up their money among themselves, there wouldn’t be enough to go around.